If you lived in Salem....

My name is Joan and I have been living at The Salem Inn because I can't stand the screeching of my house guests...one was fine but when the loud one moved in I had to leave; no room for me or the kids, if they would speak to me. I have a lot to figure out, kids paternity, my paternity, maternity etc. lol I need quiet time.
 
MAN, what a day... I fell several stories down an elevator shaft. Lucky for me, I didn't break anything at all! And I still look hot in my sweats; just needed a small bandaid, attention from a nice looking doctor. whew! But please pray for my brother- he stubbed his toe yesterday on his ex girlfriends coffee table and slipped into a coma. He'll wake up when the writers come up with a better story for him I'm sure. thanks y'all!
 
I'm Rafe's fiancee that "died", little did he know that I'm Sami's sister, via Roman, although he doesn't know about it because Stefano was holding him prisoner and he doesn't remember that time of his life.

My mom is Princess Gina, not the fake "Hope/Gina", but the real Gina. I didn't really die in the accident, but was in a coma and was nursed back to health by my little sister Greta. I want my finace back. Sami, Kate, and Jordan, better all watch out, nobody comes between this princess and her man.
 
Oh good grief....someone let me know one of my embryos was stolen...now I have 5 kids to unravel...according to my source his name is Rory and lives here in Salem also. I met a Rory once ...nah can't be the same one this kid was kinda "far out" there .
 
I found out that Kate Roberts was my mother and she gave me up at birth. After months of pressuring her to tell me who my father is, I had to blackmail her into reveling to me that my father is.....the Phoenix, Stefano Dimera!
 
My parents were killed when I was very little. My aunt told me they died in a car accident and I was the only survivor... obviously I don't remember despite having a nearly photographic memory. Anyway, I was raised by my aunt and we lived a very sheltered life together, and she would never talk to me about my parents, but after my graduation from high school, she got kind of tipsy and I got out of her that my mom was from Salem. So now my aunt thinks I'm backpacking in Europe with my best friend but actually she's covering for me while I sneak off to Salem to find out more about my mother.
 
Dr. Jonas performed the sex change surgery on lonewriter with only a shoestring and a tube of super glue. He was limited to the space of a closet in the Horton cabin. He also had the help of Stefano DiMera's goons that were shot at soon after, so they had to run away.

:eek: oh dear... this thread is taking a strange turn... hahahahahaha...:rotfl:
 
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